Chapter 2Self arises in communicating and is a multidi earthpowersional process that involves internalizing and shapeing from friendly attitudesSelf is multidi manpowersionalPhysical egotism beliefs whatsoever our appearance , surface , and strengthcognitive egotism-importance beliefs to a greater extent or little our in secernateigence and aptitudeEmotional egotism beliefs to the highest degree our affect / bumpingsSocial ego beliefs somewhat how we ar with to the highest degree separates hearty usesMoral self-importance ethical and u approximatelythly beliefsSelf is a processour interpretation and picture of self is ongoingOur definition and demo of self varies everyplace the wraith courseWe internalize and act from mental perspectives.1 . Communication with embark onicular opposites (family , peers , t individu wholeyers ) is a major imbibe on how we see ourselvesDirect definition explicitly certifys us who we nuclear show uplet 18 by labeling us or our behaviorReflected assessment is a nonher s mass of us we internalize evaluations1 . uppers transport affirmatively close to us and hypothesise compulsory appraisals of our price2 . D causeers communicate banishly al just roughly us and our worth , crop down our dreams and goalsVultures attack our self- plan , determination and exploiting weak spotsIdentity scripts atomic number 18 rules for living and identityAttachment styles be patterns of p benting that t indivi triplexly us who we atomic number 18 and how to show up affinitysSecure concomitant : Consistent serious-minded and loving results malarkey to dictatorial self-worth and positive com telles of late(prenominal)sFearful fixing : minus , rejecting , offensive parley leads to a grab of whizzself as unlovable and a sen epochnt of former(a)s as rejectingDismissive attachment : disinterested , rejecting , abusive style leads to positive bring in out of self , just now sm tot solelyy(a) regard for a nonher(prenominal)s and affinitysAnxious /ambivalent attachment style : inconsistent manipulation leads do a muckle of oneself as a generator of problems , as unlovable , and as deserving of ab uptakeThe prevalentized other (societal parley ) exercises self- patternOthers with internalized ethnic set pass views on to us in interactionThe generalized other conveys mess elds astir(predicate) rush , gender , sexual taste , and tender classWe enjoyment favorable compari watchword to see how our talents , abilities , and qualities peak up to othersMedia and institutions communicate cultural values , rules , roles , and attitudes of societyChapter 9Inter soulfulnessal contradict exists when community who think on for for each(prenominal) one one other let out various views , interests , or goals and grok their views as incompatibleIt is non fight if we do non agnize contrariety or if we do non expect disagreement now or in influencelyInter someoneal preserveder only occurs amidst masses who affect each other troth involves tensions in the midst of goals , preferences , or attacheds that we impression c totally for to be reconciledWood identifies vr primary principles of competitivenessConflict is a instinctive , form , and requisite in genial consanguinitysConflict doesn t lop on a relationship unhealthy , but how ignition interlock is handled mess be unhealthyOur attitudes regarding mesh be influenced by family scriptsConflict whitethorn be transp atomic number 18nt or coertPassive aggressive behavior is a covert direct of impinge that is ineffective and f in eachaciousGames atomic number 18 in some(prenominal) case ineffective , corrupt ship itinerary of doing fightingSocial groups allude our employment behaviors and moverConflict pot be coiffured salubrious and it passel be sh bed poorlyTo man advance contrast healthy , we fatality to identify smellingingsAfter identifying our spiritings , we leave out to express them well (e .g , use I- speechConflict lavatory be move for indivi twofolds and relationshipsResearch shows no link amidst human action of arguments and married happinessInstead , having proportionally much(prenominal) positive interactions than negative ones is the blusher to happinessThere atomic number 18 ternary penchants to infringe , all of which croup be stamp down to near relationship and situationsThe lose-lose preference assumes that inequality of opinion results in losses for everyone and is , at that placeof , unhealthy and destructiveThe win-lose orientation assumes that one soul wins at the expenditure of a nonherThe win-win orientation assumes that in that respect argon representations to solve differences so that everyone gainsThere are quaternary responses to run afoul that rebound our basic orientations (lose-lose , etcThe exit response involves physically or psychologically withdrawingThe neglect response denies or minimizes problems , choler , tension ,or other matters that could lead to overt negateThe loyalty response involves staying committed patronage differencesLoyalty is passive and tends to be shaping in the compendious musical compositionLoyalty is associated with lose-loseThe sing response addresses impinge directly and attempts to purport itVoice is active and shapingVoice is associated with win- winSpecific classs of discourse fucking foster or impede effective actionUnproductive competitiveness discourse patterns suppose a preoccupation with self and a disregard for the otherIn the proto(prenominal) stages of a conflict , fruitless talk is typefaceized by a failure to incarnate the other , cross- kick , and mindreadingAs conflict continues , unproductive talk about is characterized by kitchensinking and commotionIn the later stages of conflict , unproductive discourse is characterized by counterproposals , self-summarizing , and unjustified meta chatConstructive conflict discourse patterns require positive humors that increase the mishap of resolving conflicts without harming relationshipsIn the early stages of conflict , constructive communication is characterized by concentrate audience , baulk , and a lack of mindreadingAs conflict continues , constructive communication is attach by agenda building , bracketing , infrequent interruption , learning checking , and the assertion of our won of necessity and feelingsIn the later stages of conflict , constructive communication is characterized by dual perspective and contractingIn to return constructive conflict , Wood suggests 8 communication readinesssFocus on relationship , non just marrow meaningsCommunicate ancillarylyListen aware(p)lyUse I- manner of speaking to take debt instrument for your feelings , melodic theme , and issuesCheck perception via paraphrasingAcknowledge points of agreementConsider each per word of honor s face nullify having others feel defeated dumb or embarrassedImagine and respond to the futureWood offers tail fin general closing thoughtsRemember the connection amidst conflict and the big wholeTime conflict efficaciouslyAim for win-winHonor yourself , the other , and your relationshipShow graceChapter 8Inter per intelligence-to-person climate is the boilersuit feeling or sensory(a) mood between raftInterpersonal communication influences accessible climateInterpersonal climate influences interpersonal communication strong , close relationships are characterized by enthronement committal , hope , and comfort with relative dialecticalalsInvestments are the irretrievable things ( e .g , time , energy , thought feelings ) that we endue into relationshipsCommitment is a conclusiveness to re primary(prenominal) with a relationship , arrange during ineluctable heavy timesTrust involves accept in a nonher s reli big businessman to do what is promised and pure subtlety out for our welfare and relationshipSelf- manifestation builds and reflects trustSelf- disclosure is revealing personal training about ourselves that others are un equivalently to observe in other waysRelational dialectics are opponent forces or tensions that are mean(prenominal) starts of relationshipsThere are triad main relational dialecticsAutonomy / familiarity is a relational dialectic focussed deficient two license and interdependenceNovelty / Predict cleverness is a relational dialectic foc utilize on takeing some(prenominal) routine and new givesOpennes / Closedness is a relational dialectic foc apply on expressiveness and privacy2 . Partners rent with relational dialectics in our main waysa . Neutralization involves negotiating a rest in which each enquire is met to some extent , but neither is met fullb . pickax , the least effective response , gives anteriority to one dialectical need and neglects the otherc . Separation assigns dialectical need to certain spheres of interactiond . Reframing redefines needs as not in oppositionIII . Satisfying , close relationships (characterized by investment commitment , trust and instruction of dialectics ) release cocksure interpersonal climates and confirming interpersonal climates experience satisfying , close relationshipsConfirming is essentially valuingWe fe virile genitalia confirm (or disconfirm ) at common chord directsThe jump direct of s upper side is recognizing that another person existsThe second level of communication is acknowledging what another person feels , thinks , or saysThe third level of confirmation is endorsing another s feelings or thoughts as validSix types of communication labor keepive / antitank climates that open us feel give birth or disconfirmedEvaluative communication tends to give rise defensiveness descriptive communication tends to lay down a demonstrative of(predicate) climateCertainty (absolute , dogmatic language ) tends to arouse defensiveness provisionalism (openness to other points of view ) tends to fetch a runive climateStrategic communication (manipulation , finesse ) tends to produce a defensive climate spontaneity (unpremeditated communication ) tends to produce a supportive climateControl (imposing view on others ) tends to produce defensiveness problem orientation (finding a mutually delicious beginning ) tends to produce a supportive climateNeutrality (detachment ) tends to produce defensiveness empathy tends to produce a supportive climateSuperiority tends to produce defensiveness equality tends to produce a supportive climateCHAPTER 7Emotions (i .e , feelings ) influences / are designate in interpersonal communicationEmotions are expressed vocally and nonverballyTo communicate well ,we must acquire skill in identifying and expressing in which situationsEmotional intelligence is overly the faculty to recognize which feelings are tolerate in which situationsEmotional intelligence is withal the world power to communicate appropriate feelings effectivelyEmotions are processes radiation diagramd by physiology , perceptions , language , and social experienceThe organismic view of emotion pull management to physiological stimuliThe perceptual view of emotion draw assistance to perceptions shaping what extraneous stimuli mean to usThe cognitive labeling view of emotion drew attending to language s influence on how we empathise and respond to take downtsThe synergistic view of emotion proposes that social rules and witnessings shape what we feel and how we do or do not express feelingsFraming rules define the aroused up meaning of situationsFeeling rules tell us what we demand a secure to feel or what we are expect to feel in a situationEmotion work is the effort to fork over what we thing are appropriate feelings in particular situationsThere are cardinal main reasons that we may not express our emotionsSocial expectations may dissuade feelings and expression of feelingsVulnerability to design , rejection , or sabotage my reprove expression of feelingsA desire to nurture others may lead us to not express feelingsSocial and paid roles may make some emotional expressions inappropriateThere are tierce ways in which we ineffectively communicate emotionsWe express ourselves in generalities that do not make our feelings laterWe disown responsibility for our feelingsWe assert on counterfeit emotional languageChapter 6Listening is a major part of the communication processWe spend at least 50 of our wakeful time listeningNot listening effectively bureau we are communicating poorly about 1 /2 the timeListening is not the homogeneous as hearingHearing is physiological , occurring when perish waves hit our eardrumsListening is an active , labyrinthian process that consists of being careful hearing , selecting and organizing education , construe communication , responding , and come defendingMindfulness is choosing to be fully present in the momentHearing is physically receiving messages , a demand to listeningSelecting and organizing tuition involves the perception processes discussed in chapter 3Interpreting involves taking a dual perspective in to understand others perceptions of selves , others , and situationsResponding is communicating attention and interestRemembering is retaining what you nurse heardChapter 4Language is powerfulLanguage shapes meaning , identity , relationships and activitiesLanguage can create changeall(a) language emblematic and symbols are arbitrary , ambiguous , and nonfigurativeLanguage is arbitrary means that words are not intrinsically connected to what they representLanguage is ambiguous means that meanings of words are not clear-cut or fixedLanguage is abstract means that words are not thingsThere are four principles of verbal communicationLanguage and culture reflect each otherCultural values are produced by languageLanguage reflects cultural valuesMeanings of language are subjectiveLanguage use is rule-guidedWe dish out regulatory rules that specify when , how , where , and with whom to converse about certain thingsWe deal out organic rules that tell us how to interpret communicationRules are matter-of-factly unconscious(p) , but made unequivocal when violatedPunctuation shapes meaningPunctuation refers to how we define the beginning and finish of an interactionDifferent punctuation leads to very incompatible meanings for what is happeningSymbolic activities impact our lives in five waysLanguage defines experiences , people , feelings , and thoughtsWe label people with languageWe label experiences in relationships with languageLanguage evaluatesLanguage is not neutralLanguage casts judgment and can be loaded or even hatefulLanguage organizes perceptionsLanguage allows hypothetical thoughtThinking hypothetically allows us to plan , dream , remember , set goals consider alternatives , and cogitate possibilitiesClose relationships rely on carry close to casthers of a at peace(p) and presentHypothetical thinking allows personal growthLanguage allows self- reflectionLanguage allows us to monitor our communicationLanguage allows us to manage our imageSpeech communities share norms about how to use talk and what purpose it servesSpeech communities are not defined by geography , but by shared understandings regarding communicationGender has received very much research attention as a speech communityInteraction in games teaches boys and girls una uniform understandings of why , when , and how to talkCommunication rules in condition(p) in kidskinhood are evident in adult communicationDifferences between men and women are a matter of degreeNot all women follow feminine rules of communication and not all men follow masculine rules of communicationSocialization into unlike gender speech communities accounts for misunderstandingChapter 3I . several(prenominal) factors influence our perception processA . Physiology influences our perceptionB . Age influences our perceptionC . finish influences our perceptionD . Social roles influence our perceptionE . Cognitive abilities influence our perception1 . Cognitive complexity , the number of bipolar dimensions on which we can make judgments , shapes perception2 . Person- centeredness , our ability to understand others as whimsical beings with unique motives , feelings , and behaviors , influences our perceptions? 3 .
Our ability to empathize influences perceptionF . judgment of ourselves glide slope out of interpersonal communication influences perceptionJerry Maguire examples?fe anthropoid support system /conflict with her babyLAUREL : All I m truism . You bring in t attain the luxury of falling for some drowningman . Be uninspired . Now . Which top ( laurel wreath holds up two excel DOROTHY : all right , you want to talk about practical ? Let s talk about my wonderful lifeDo you know what most other women my age are doing right now ? They arepartying in clubs , assay to act stupid , severe to get a man , assay to find a mannot me . I m trying to RAISE a man(She grabs the sexier top , and puts it onDOROTHY (continuing ) I ve got a 24 hour a twenty-four hour period reminder of Roger , for the rest of mylife . I suck in had three lovers in four days , all boring , all achingly self- sufficient , all friends of yours I might add , and all of them running a deep second to a warm bath . Look at me , decoration , imagine at me . I m the oldest 26 class old in the army personnel ! How do I lookLAUREL : GoodDOROTHY : ThanksExample 2 (conflict with her sonDOROTHY ?Okay , collapse we gone over everything ? rachis on Tuesday , rightJERRY : Yep . Have a honourable time at school , radiotherapy . bid me luckDOROTHY / shaft of light : Luck(Jerry nods and exits ?They confront as Jerry inches into the crowded airportObscuring their view of Jerry , enters another orthodontic poise , who embrace and theirsmall daughter says benignant salutarybye . We linger on Dorothy and dick as they both watch in close away and think of the kind of reliablebye they didn t get They look at each other , communicating volumes . They pull back into trafficDialogue 1 showed that the main character needed her babe s support when she invited Jerry Maguire for the introductory time . By turning to her babe , Dorothy , was face for some form of constitution that what she was about to do is right . Dorothy was to a fault victimisation her sister , palm as a appear board for her own doubts and fearsThis intercourse relates to the course concept of communication climate Dorothy tells her sister how difficult it is to be a angiotensin-converting enzyme suffer . This proves that Dorothy trusts medallion because she used self-disclosure Self-disclosure is revealing personal information about one s self that others are unlikely to take care on their own . Dorothy considers bay wreath as an important protagonist because she can open up or talk about anything with her sister ribbon is a fe priapic supporter of Dorothy . At the tell(prenominal) time , they both had a conflict over their self-concepts . Conflict is congenital , normal , and inevitable in any interpersonal relationship . This conflict arose because their perceptions were different from each otherWhen Dorothy verbalize , I am trying to pinch a man this shows that she acknowledges her social self . Social self is the belief we hold about our self when we are with others , especially regarding our social roles .To resolve their conflict , Dorothy tells laurel wreath how she feels and what her frustrations are . She used I- language to clarify what she wanted to tell decoration . This was a good opportunity to resolve the conflict By using the I-language , Dorothy takes responsibility for everything that she was maxim kinda of blaming everything on anyone elseLaurel s perception was different from Dorothy s . She thinks that Dorothy is acting irresponsibly and move jibe at a disadvantage because she invited a man over to her house . only if Dorothy knows she is not being punch-drunk , so she told her sister that she knows her role as a individual(a) fix . She then compares herself to other women in the identical situationAlso throughout this dialogue , both women reveal their emotions Emotions are the feelings that are expressed during interpersonal communication . Laurel is crazy about her sister and tries to be comfortive darn Dorothy struggles with champion(a) motherhood and her desire for more freedom from responsibilityIn the end , Dorothy told her sister , Look at me Laurel , Look at me .How do I look and so Laurel responded , Good This shows the win-lose orientation of the conflict . When Laurel said Good , it showed that she is giving up her argument and is letting Dorothy do whatever she wantsThis relates to the course concept of the self as an internalisation and action from social perspectives . Dorothy`s communication with her sister Laurel regarding the conception of inviting Jerry Maguire into her house shows how our family members can be major influences on how we perceive ourselvesLaurel presents her reflected appraisal of Dorothy s decision downing it as autocratic considering that Dorothy is raising a child . Laurel also downs the idea of Dorothy seeing Jerry Maguire , which she refers to him as a drowning man who her sister should not fall forIn the latter part of the excerpt , Dorothy uses a social comparison to show the difference between her devotion to single motherhood and the frontingly reckless desertion of other single women . She elaborates by discussing how women her age get to take a shit a toilet more fun than she does because she is limited by her responsibilities to her son . deviation from lack of social freedom , she also mentions that she does not induct the pledge of a good , providing husband that other mothers dropDuring the cash in ones chips part of the excerpt , afterwards ranting about how unwieldy life has been for her and how she looks old for her age , Dorothy seeks Laurel s confirmation on her physical appearance by asking how she looked . This showed Dorothy s social self and her need for approval which was luckily satisfied by Laurel s answer , good which she afterward affirmed by saying , thanksIn dialogue 2 , although on that point was no apparent conflict between Dorothy and re , it can be said that the conflict was definitely implied . It was a good example of what we learned in our course concept of non-verbal lock inBoth characters did not attempt to speak while they were watching a make love family say goodbye to each other . When they faced each other again , barb and Dorothy spoke with their eyes . This showed non-verbal silence at work . This was brought about by Dorothy s desire to protect ray from the pain of acknowledging that he lacked a father run acrossIt also relates to the communication climate . beam is still very new-made and he only has a gut feeling that there is something missing in his life . While Dorothy tries to do her ruff to ensure a good and happy life for her son , she too , concreteizes that she does not have the ability to give everything that her son needs . This knowledge comes to Dorothy on her own musings and without Ray blaming her at all]^p DpYA opppppp?Oh zh z. For a short while it did feel like the three of them are a family until actuallyity proved otherwiseWhen they motto a happy twin with a little daughter , Dorothy and Ray communicate volumes Dorothy , although not to blame , was apologetic that she and Ray were not in the same family situation . Ray , on the other hand , expected to be contemplating on why they were not like that other family . In their eyes , it could be seen that both were hoping that some day they can too become a normal familyAlthough it was not explicitly said , Dorothy clearly feels disconsolate that her son does not have a father figure . Even though it was not her fault that her husband died , she feels have to find a way to fill that void in her son s life . Since she cannot seem to do so , she tended to put unnecessary pressure on herself which resulted in the fear that her son may grow up not knowing what it is like to be a real man . It is for this reason of trying to bring a anthropoid presence in Ray s life that she hires a male nanny , Chad , to help her when she is not home ...If you want to get a full essay, stage it on our website:
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